2/20/08:

Fraternal Spirituality - Sam Dunlop

Good Morning. My name is Sam Dunlop I am an ’05 graduate of St. Norbert College- and I currently work in the Center for International Education as the International Recruitment Specialist for the college.

In my role as a recruiter for St. Norbert College, the ability to articulate why a student should choose St. Norbert is of critical importance. No doubt, prospective students want to hear a laundry list of reasons that our institution, and not another, can afford them success, and a path towards achieving their hopes and dreams. In our promotional materials, we often talk about St. Norbert College as a place to call home. And while I believe that that phrase does neatly express how well we, as a community, try to care for one another, it may be difficult for an outsider- or a prospective student- to know what we mean until they find themselves as a member of our community.

For me, and I think for some of the other individuals you will hear from today-  you will find that the St. Norbert experience is one that is not solely summarized by listing our awards, academic opportunities, athletic programs, or even social groups.

Rather, the greatness of the St. Norbert College experience is about relationships.

Today our focus is on what we call fraternal spirituality. The bond of brotherhood that exists here at St. Norbert-  that not only established the brick and mortar of this very church, but that has in part, sustained it, and flourishes on campus today in a variety of ways.

I also offer this preface to assure our female members of the community that this theme is not meant to be exclusionary. Actually, quite the contrary.  The core reflection of today’s message is one that aspires to challenge each of us, male and female alike, to better appreciate the exceptionality of our community of St. Norbert. While today we discuss how St. Norbert has been the place, and our fraternity Tau Kappa Epsilon, has been the vessel- our theme, more broadly expressed, is about friendship, sisterhood, collegiality, and camaraderie.

Today, our community faces a challenge as demographics continue to change in the student populations we recruit, especially when considering our male/female ratio. Our freshmen domestic student recruits were 61% female and 39% male this last fall.  While an abundance of female students has never fazed most male students, this national trend suggests, perhaps, that there are needs going unmet in communities like our own.

Tau Kappa Epsilon, the fraternity I was a member of as a student here, and for which I now serve as the Alumni Advisor, played an incredible role in my formation as a leader, as a brother, and as a Christian.

In the autumn of 2002, I was starting the second year of my life at St. Norbert College. In my time as a freshman I had joined the student government, run unsuccessfully for an officer position, DJ’d for WSNC, joined the cast of Knight Theatre in Jesus Christ Superstar, and had also just been hired as a Resident Assistant. I had found all of the organizations and clubs I could have ever imagined- but was not yet feeling spiritually or socially fulfilled. In passing, I had met members who were a part of social groups and Greek life, but, in my own way, dismissed that notion, as lacking substance and sincerity. What type of people needed to pay for their friends? Certainly not me.

In truth, I desperately wanted to be a valued part of something. Where I, as a person, not just my talents or contributions, were appreciated.

Toward that end, a friend from my previous year in Madelaine hall paid me a visit in Burke Hall one night when I was on duty. He shared with me the collective interest that his fraternity had in me. They saw that I was involved and wanted to know if I’d be interested in learning more. I told him I would. That first conversation, and outstretched hand initiated a number of subsequent conversations that led to me accepting the challenge to join TKE.  That gesture, and the combined willingness of the group to embrace someone who did not fully match their historical mold, changed the course of my SNC experience for the better.

But, like any family, we, as brothers, have had our share of good times and bad.

In my senior year, as my time at St. Norbert, as a student, was coming to a close, the pressure of my inevitable graduation drew closer and closer. Coupled with that pressure, and the anxiety about life post-St. Norbert, I had to contend with my responsibilities as an RA, as an Ugly, a newly elected Alderperson, as a teke, and of course- as a student. I struggled with a depression problem that, when coupled with weight issues, left me feeling incredibly isolated and often angry. My brothers didn’t understand because I didn’t think they could. I carried the emotional stress of all of those things alone. I did not need to.

When I finally came forward with my troubles, to my fellow tekes, and members of the college community- I received an outpouring of support that I never anticipated. Some individuals, with whom I had turbulent relations in the past, offered prayers and paid me visits. In that time specifically, I saw God through my brothers- I saw the reasons I had come to St. Norbert, and why TKE was where I needed to be.

In TKE, we have a slogan to describe the balance of our brotherhood experience: The Choice to Belong, the Challenge to Become. This mantra is appropriate for anyone in our college community. Norbertine, student, professor, administration, and staff alike.  While we choose to be here, we are challenged to be authentic in our relations with our fellow community members. It will be our ability to find God in one another, and our combined willingness to invest in our brothers and sisters alike, that will continue to make St. Norbert College a place we can always call home.  We must not only make the choice to be a part of this community, but challenge ourselves to invest in it and each other.